How Long Before The Shooting Starts...

Ministers seek deal with Iran for captives
By Sean Rayment, Tim Shipman and Patrick Hennessy, Sunday Telegraph

Ministers are preparing a compromise deal to allow Iran to save face and release its 15 British military captives by promising that the Royal Navy will never knowingly enter Iranian waters without permission. (in other words admit that they were wrong and allow Iran a pass on an act of war)

The Sunday Telegraph has learnt of plans to send a Royal Navy captain or commodore to Teheran, as a special envoy of the Government, to deliver a public assurance that officials hope will end the diplomatic standoff.

The renewed search for a solution was given greater urgency when a senior Iranian official said that moves had begun to put the 15 British captives on trial. (another violation of the Geneva Conventions As we give terrorists rights under these conventions the people that supply the terrorists piss on them)

Iran's ambassador to Moscow, Gholamreza Ansari, announced: "Legal moves to determine the guilt of the British sailors have been launched." In an interview with a Russian television channel, he said: "The legal process is going on and has to be completed and if they are found guilty they will face punishment." (exicution)

Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad plans to make a formal statement on the crisis on Tuesday. Last night, he denounced Britain's failure to apologise and decision to go to the United Nations: "This is not the legal and logical way." (the logical way would be to bomb the shit out of them)

Foreign Secretary Margaret Beckett said: "Everyone regrets that this position has arisen. What we want is a way out of it. We want it peacefully and we want it as soon as possible." (ah yes the sounds of the dhimmie)

Defence officials emphasised that they were not preparing to concede that the two British boats detained nine days ago were at fault. But one said: "We are quite prepared to give the Iranians a guarantee that we would never knowingly enter their waters without their permission, now or in the future. (this shows that the Brits have the same problem in their Parliment that we have with the Democrats in ours)

We are not apologising, nor are we saying that we entered their waters in the first place. (yes you are in the eyes of the Arabs you ASSHOLE) But it may offer a route out of the crisis."

Details of the strategy emerged as a former Falklands War commander expressed fury at how the sailors surrendered to Iranian gunboats without a fight.

Maj Gen Julian Thompson called for a review of the Navy's rules of engagement, dictated by the United Nations, that they cannot open fire unless they are shot at first. "In my view this thing is a complete cock-up," he said. (I like this guy)

"I want to know why the Marines didn't open fire or put up some sort of fight. My fear is that they didn't have the right rules of engagement, which would allow them to do this."

A former Iranian ambassador to the UN, Sayed Rajai Korasani, said that Britain should be more conciliatory and called for a delegation of MPs to seek the handover of the sailors. (yeah cut Blair out of the picture and let Parliment deal with the issue)

President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad's most extensive comments on the crisis closely followed tough talk from other Iranian officials, an indication that Tehran's position could be hardening.

"Instead of apologizing over trespassing by British forces, the world arrogant powers issue statements and deliver speeches," the country's official news agency quoted Ahmadinejad as saying.

The European Union demanded Friday that Iran immediately and unconditionally release the Britons and warned of unspecified "appropriate measures" if Tehran does not comply. (gee I guess that means the EU might what sell them less arms...LOL)

The Iranian Foreign Ministry on Saturday dismissed the EU's "biased and meddlesome" comments, saying the dispute solely involved the governments of Iran and Britain. (not quite butthead those are coalition forces, the only reason the US has not commenced bombing runs is the Brits have asked us to wait. We can only hope that they grow tired of this farce)
Iran
British Sailors